“Silas, what are you doing?!” The Voice screamed in his head, louder this time. That Voice that always told him when there would be a surprise test. That Voice that always told him when not to try the ATM because it would debit him without paying and then swallow his card. That Voice that told him when a sinner needed to receive God’s forgiveness.
Silas’s eyes flipped open and bought him back to reality. He wasn’t surfing on the clouds and grabbing leaves off the tops of trees in the Swiss Alps. He was in fact holding a pair of chocolate breasts in his hands, and his lips were locked with hers.
“Jesus!“ Silas screamed as he scrambled off the bed. Whatever daze he had been under in the last 5 minutes had certainly worn off.
“I have to leave”, he said.
“What?! Why now?” she asked, hunger in her eyes.
She reluctantly slipped her nightgown over her bare body and turned over in the bed, when she realized she would get no answers. Silas stole quietly back to his own room, ducking beneath Jennifer’s windows lest anyone spot him. But why was he worried anyway? It’s not like anyone could possibly know what he’d just almost done.
Once he shut the door, he masturbated to the recent memory of everything he’d just done. And then begged God to forgive him for committing the sin of Onan. Of course he’d been shocked when in the middle of discussing something from one of Paul’s letters, she said, “Silas, kiss me”. He ignored that silly suggestion like any Christian brother would and pretended he didn’t hear. 20 minutes later, a pair of cold wet lips cut off his air supply. His brain told him what his soul refused to believe, that she had stolen a kiss. He tried pulling away but she clung to his body tighter. He tried pushing her away only to find that she’d slipped one arm of her nightgown down and left her right tit out. He was surprised at how warm and soft it felt- he had always imagined women’s breasts felt like plastic or at best aluminum from seeing Jennifer hang up her bra. But this thing was alive, and beating, and hardening to the touch. “You like that?” She’d asked as she slipped off the other hand, sitting upright now, completely bare-chested. She pulled his head closer and nuzzled it in her cleavage. His mouth sought out her nipples as his fingers instinctively slid up her thigh till they found a moist nest of pubic hair. “What are you doing Silas? “ The Voice had asked.
Yes, he escaped without having sex. But his conscience condemned him for going that far. He slept uneasy that night. He suddenly couldn’t hear The Voice. His dream was just empty and random. When he saw her the next day on his way to class, he flinched. He tried to deny it, but she told him the blunt truth. “You made me feel like a demon, Silas. We’re making out and you Shouted Jesus!! like I’m a witch or something”. He smiled sheepishly as he walked out of the gate, sure that she’d still be staring at his back. “I’ll see you when you come back” she said, her voice dripping with more fire than he hoped was true.
“Brother Silas! Brother Silas!”
Silas felt like a complete hypocrite having to answer that name. But he turned anyway. It was brother Paul. His prayer partner. Walking steadily towards him. Brother Paul sat down beside him.
“My Father in Israel!” Brother Paul hailed in that classic “fellowship” way people liked to greet others.
“Brother Paul, if i’m your father, then you’re my ancestor! “he replied.
“Ah ahn, Brother Silas, you know before Abraham, Jesus Christ was!”
“See now, you’re the one quoting Spiritual Mysteries! You are the real father indeed!”
“Brother Silas, the Bible says that God shows the secret things to his elect! The secret of the Lord is with those that fear him!”
Silas felt a chill go through his body. Surely this brother knew what he had done. God must have revealed it to him while he was holding one of his various prayer meetings with God alone on the School Field.
“Silas, are you okay?”
“Of course I’m fine. why do you ask?”
“well, i saw you while I was praying last night.”
Dear God. He really knows. If he did, then probably half of everyone in the fellowship must know by now. Because God could have shown everyone.
“really? what did the Lord tell you? hope it’s my mansions in heaven you were counting?”
“He just told me to start praying for you. I wanted to pray for the body of Christ but the Holy Spirit kept telling me to pray for you. I saw a snake wrapping all around you, about to bite you. Then All of a sudden, a light shone into the room and the snake melted away.”
Silas felt himself go weak at the knees. He felt his stomach turn as if he was going to vomit. His heart pricked him.
“Silas, what’s the matter?”
There was no point in hiding anything. Silas told him everything, from when they first met in his compound 2 weeks ago. He’d followed the sound of someone singing “Jerusalem” in that Opera grade Soprano, and she said she’d just moved in to the flat beside Jennifer’s. The day he tried to get her to attend fellowship and she literally ran away when they got to the door. Looking back now, he noticed how much junk she said about God. “Oh, spare me that talk about Jesus. Jesus was a gangster. It might as well have been Eminem and the D12”. He’d assumed she was just a lost, hurt soul that needed to hear more about God. But that discussion ended up with them between her sheets.
“Silas, God really loves you, that’s why he didn’t let you go all the way with that girl. I wonder what would have opened If I didn’t pray for you when The Spirit prompted me to. After I prayed for about 20 minutes I heard the Lord say, ‘tell Silas that I have chosen him to do exploits for me, and that nothing can separate Him from the Love I have for him. Not heights, not depths, not famine, not darkness, not satan, not my angels, not disease, not sin. NOTHING can separate him from my love. But he must be careful because the days are evil and the children of darkness will stop at nothing to destroy the anointing on his life’”
Silas thanked him and walked away. He found a quiet corner and began to whisper softly to God.
“I’m sorry God. That was really stupid of me. I should have gotten out of there when she started talking about a kiss. I should have known it wouldn’t stop there. Can we please start again?”
“Anytime, Son. As long as you admit you were wrong” The Voice Said.
“Oh, thank you, THANK YOU, GOD!!” Silas squealed with true delight. A few people turned their heads but when they realized it was a “brother” they returned to whatever they were doing.
“one more thing, Silas. Criminology lecture isn’t holding. You can go home now”
“wow, I thought you would take your time before you started telling me all those things again” Silas whispered back, smiling.
“My ways are not your ways, human!. By the way, you should check on Her when you get home”
“what?! please I don’t think I’m strong enough. Once bitten, God. You Know that”
“come on. Trust me. I have a surprise for you”
Silas got home, expecting to see Her or hear her voice. Instead the whole compound was silent. he knocked on her door, but no one answered. He knocked on Jennifer’s door. She opened, her face mapped with sleep lines.
“who’s Lizzy?” Jennifer asked as she stretched.
“The girl who moved in next door to you last week?”
“Pastor, nobody ever moved in here. This place has been empty for months.”
“No, I’m serious.” Silas described her.
“Seriously? you woke me up to crack jokes? alright, let’s take a look at her ‘room'”
Jennifer pushed the door open and it creaked open slowly, cobwebs forming an artificial doorstop. She pushed the door open further and Silas walked in. There was nothing broken ceiling boards, dusty wardrobes, cobwebs on the windows and lizards running across the tile floor.